Sometimes you and your person or people really connect. That’s what makes it harder when they send mixed signals. The ups and downs can make your anxiety and self-doubt spiral.

You may understand why they pull away when stressed– their past trauma, or the oppression they face– so you don’t want to hold it against them. 

Maybe their family doesn’t support the relationship, they’re on an identity journey, or they’re having feelings about your gender. You want to be patient. 

But you have struggles, too. You wish you could get that same patience and care back. 

When you’re apart, you’d love to focus on friends, family, hobbies, or activism, or just feel at ease being alone. Instead, the relationship sometimes takes over your brain. 

It’s like when things with them are good, you’re good, and when they’re not, you’re not.

It doesn’t have to be like that.